I *think* I am on some kind of journey. As in, life is a journey. And I am living life?
Sigh. How pedantic.
I don’t quite know where I am in the whole process anymore.
I am not losing weight. For the most part I am not gaining weight.
I am not eating clean but I would also not describe my eating habits as ‘dirty’ either.
I am exercising but not as variedly as before (pretty much just hot yoga these days, with a personal training session every two weeks).
So I am not doing ‘nothing’ but I am not following ‘the plan’ either. Is that wrong? Will the world explode? What will happen if I eat a few processed meals? If I don’t get down to 150lbs? or 145lbs? If I don’t do a really heavy squat for a little while?
I know nothing will really happen. I won’t me reaching my goals any time soon. I get that. But maybe I need to readjust them (?) or just take longer getting there (?) or accept that I need to get my ass back in gear and get back on track (?).
I don’t know which answer is the right answer. I feel as though I am ignoring it all right now. I am not putting on any significant weight, I teeter around 154lbs most days. That’s fine, it’s in my comfort zone (while still being 9lbs away from my goal! – and then I think about how it’s only 9 lbs!).
So for now, I sit here, in a holding pattern, until I get my act together.